Grouse House or Fun House?

Relocating the Setters and myself into northern ruff country at times reminds me of the Fun House back at the amusement park that I went to as a kid.  Although the grounds look familiar and pretty straight forward at first glance, you never know what lies around the next corner.  And like the carnival mirrors which distort the most familiar of all images, your own body, sometimes even very familiar settings have all new dimensions and twists.  Take banking for instance.  My task today: open and establish a checking account in my new community and deposit some checks which finally found their way to me via the US Postal Service, although I am confident that the Pony Express would have been quicker.

Bank #1: Hello, I am moving into the area and would like to open a checking account as I have several checks that I need to deposit. "Sure! What is your name and address?"  Well, I have a contract on a house but have not yet closed on it, however I did open a PO Box here.  "Okay, well then I need your Michigan drivers license to open an account." Me: I am not yet able to get a MI drivers license because I do not yet have an address. "I'm sorry, I cannot open an account without an address, please come back when you get your drivers license or an address"

Bank #2: " There is a $xx monthly fee charged for a checking account, here is our list of fees."  Wait, what?  You would charge me to keep my money in your bank??

Bank #3: Two smartly dressed young tellers stood behind small podiums in this bank, no long counter barricading them away from the customers.  "Welcome! Our bank is very different in that we are very oriented to the individual customer.   May I make an appointment for you to open an account?"  Umm, I have the time now and in fact came into town specifically to open an checking account.  "Well, we want to get to know each of our customers individually so we will need to make an appointment for you. Would you like to set that appointment up now?" No, I would like to open an account now.  "I'm sorry, but we need to make an appointment."

I'm trying to remember what comes after the Fun House Hall of Mirrors. Meanwhile, we returned to our wonderful camp in the forest with only the breeze in the tree tops for noise.  And we will breathe.